第九章表姐来支招了!(1 / 1)

华诤回到家时,家人都睡了。第二天起得晚,下楼吃早餐时,父母亲和姑姑都出去买东西了,只见表姐cindy穿着牛仔裤和t-shirt,光着脚丫子,一只腿踩缩在椅子上,正对着餐桌坐着吃东西呢。

“hey,matty,finallygetup,ah?”

比华诤大一岁的表姐cindy岳思思是abc,也就是传说中的“香蕉人”。她短发烫得卷卷地贴着头皮,瘦瘦的,皮肤故意晒得比较黑,眼睛很大。这种外貌在美国可是很吃得开的——美国人以为,东方女孩就应该长得又黑又立体才叫有神韵。

她打的招呼让华诤不好意思地抓抓头发。宋云贞正从院里进来,关上门,回身对华诤道:

“哟,大宝贝儿,起了?”

站在华母旁的菲佣,用生硬的中文道:

“少爷吃什么早餐?”

“随便”

华母道:

“那和姐姐一样吃牛奶面包?”

“好,谢谢奶奶”

华母接过菲佣手里的餐盘,边把早餐放在餐桌上边道:

“昨天怎么这么晚才回来?”

“granny,hedefinitelyhadsomelastnight.”

cindy的脸对着外祖母解释,眼睛却是看着华诤挤眉弄眼。华诤有点怀疑自己的英文水平:

“ididn’thaveanythinglastnight.icamebackandiwentstraighttosleep.”

cindy十指张开,双掌在耳朵两边朝外举:

“eww~liar!whateveryousay.hey,whateveryousay!”

华诤觉得自己肯定跟表姐有什么误会,拉开椅子坐在她对面:

“i’mnotlying.idon’thaveto.ok?fyi,whatdoyoumeanwhenyousaidihadsome?hadsomewhat?”

“sex!ofcourse!”

华诤一口牛奶喷在餐桌上。

cindy笑着接道:

“whatdoyouthinkimean?”

华母忙过来给他拍着背:

“怎么了?宝贝,慢点喝!吃饭不要说话嘛。”

华诤边抽张纸捂嘴咳嗽,边朝祖母摆摆手、示意她不用帮忙。华母便拿了抹布来擦桌子:

“你们姐弟俩说什么呢?”

华诤忙道:

“没什么,没什么。”

“it’soktohavesex,matty,youdon’thavetolie.igetit——youareagrown-up,youareinarelationship,youhavesex.that’swhatpeopledo.hey,ibetyouirlfriendmustbereallyawesometokeepyouthatlong.”

华诤连连朝表姐摇手:

“wedidn’thavesex.we’veneverhadsex.”

“whaaaat?!”

cindy看华诤的眼神,让华诤觉得自己就像来自侏罗纪世界的恐龙。

“youserious?”

“yeah.whywouldiliesomethingaboutthat?”

华诤顿了顿,既然表姐这么光明磊落,他也不想做个萎缩怕事的人,便露出一个无奈的苦笑,坦白道:

“althoughireallywantto.tobehonest,it’skillingme!youknow,thewholenosexthing.”

“soyouarehot?”

“whatdoyouexpect?i’veneverhadsexinmyentirelife.lookatme,sis.!i’malwayshot!ok?however,mygirlfriend,she’stooshy.idon’twanttoscareheroff.”

cindy深感自己和这个表弟在文化上的差异鸿沟深深,两人根本鸡同鸭讲:

“hey,matty,sweety,look,yougottahavesexwithyouirlfriend,yougottahavewildsexwithyouirlfriend——that’swhatboyfriendsdo.that’swhatwouldkeepyouirlfriendcloser.icanensureyouthatyouarenottheonlyonewho’shot.womenhaveneeds.”

“really?”

cindy翻了一个“那还用说”的白眼,把脚放下来,正襟危坐,好像要准备谈什么事关国计民生的国家大事:

“i’magirl,right?i’vehadboyfriends.igotasayinthisstaff.yougottabelieveme,matty,markmywords——womenhaveneeds.justgoandmeettheneeds.makeyourwomanhappy.”

华诤觉得表姐背后放着万道金光——简直就是上天派来拯救他的天使!

“butidon’tknowhowtobringitup.ilovemygirlfriendtoomuch.idon’twant...”

“wowwow”

cindy双掌向外,像在推着什么东西:

“waitaminute,matty,mathew,mattwa.waitaminute!yousaidaaayouloveher?areyousure?loveisabigword.wedon’tuseitunlesswereallyfeelit.”

“yeah.ican’tbemoresure.iloveher.eversincethefirsttimeisawher,i’vebeenfallinglovewithher.actually,asdaysgoby,iloveherevenmore.look,sheisthesweetestgirli’veeverseen.ifanything,i’mhopelesslyanddesperatelyinlovewithher.”

cindy脸绷紧了,眼珠子在瞪大的眼眶中转了转:

“wow,ok.loudandclear.great.goodforyou,matty!goodforyou.soyouareinlove.doessheloveyouback?”

提这一茬,华诤有点黯然神伤,耸耸肩:

“well,iguessnot.idon’tthinkso.”

伸长手臂拍着表弟的肩膀,cindy慢慢道:

“hey,haveyoueverheardthepoem?”

“whatpoem?”

“’tobewithawomanwhodoesn’tloveyouback,ismorelonelythantobealone’”

为这句话,姐弟俩默哀了几秒钟。华诤想起什么,拍拍桌子道:

“focus!sis.focus!anyway,idon’twanttomakethingsweirdbetweenmeandmygirlfriend.arethereanytips?anythingwouldleadusto```youknow?”

“ok”

cindy摊摊手,笑道:

“youarefamily.technically,youaremylittlebrother.i’myourbigsister.andiloveyou.ido.hence,iwouldhelpyououtwheneveryouneedme.firstofall”

cindy右手从左手心里扳出一个手指头:

“yougottagetaroomforyoutwo.bealone,foodsake!”

不过,鉴于中美意识上的差异,cindy还是不放心地补充问了一句:

“isyouirlfriendokwiththat?”

华诤点点头:

“yeah.icanmakethathappen.”

“ok.secondly,thereisastorywhichwouldmakeyouirlfriendwanttohavesexwithyouvoluntarily.however,yougottastateitright.”

有这么神奇的事?

“whatstory?”

华诤正以空前绝后高涨热忱的态度在学习,大人们就回来了。华珮进门时,远远听到他们两姐弟的话,便喝道:

“思思,你忘记我们之间承诺了?在家不准说中文!”

岑兰笑道:

“是不许说英文吧?”

华珮笑道:

“唉,都被她气糊涂了。是,不准说英文!在家不准说英文!”

岳思思站起来,华诤抓住她的短袖阻止她离开:

“什么故事?”

岳思思为难道:

“对不起,你姑姑不准我说英文。我不知道用中文怎么说,我中文不好,我不会翻译。”

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